Koplis võib surma saada!!!! You can just about get KILLED in Kopli!!!!
Niipea, kui NEID jälle lähenemas näen, tõmban instinktiivselt selja kühmu ning pea õlgade vahele. Nad tormavad peale nagu marutuul, käes teravad toikad, ning löövad need napp sentimeeter sinu varvastest eemal maasse, endal peas maniakaalselt ekstaatiline ilme. Harilikult kannavad nad kulunud dresse ja liiguvad hulgakesi, kuigi inimtühjemal tänaval võib mõnda neist kohata ka üksi rutakalt ja pausita edasi tõttamas. Nad vaatavad pidevalt kella ning neil on kaasas veepudel.
As soon as I see THEM approaching, I pull my head between my shoulders and try to make myself invisible. They come at you like a whirlwind with sharp sticks in their hands and strike them into the ground just an inch away from your innocent toes, wearing a manic-happy expression that doesnt seem to notice the world around them. They usually wear old sweatsuits and move around in small gangs, although on less crowded streets you can also meet them one at a time, walking hastily and without stopping for scenery. They are constantly checking the clock and they usually carry a plain bottle of water around.
Kui sa taolise kambaga kohtudes ka terveks jääd, siis oled peagi vastamisi järgmise ohuga. See vihiseb sinust mööda täiesti ootamatult. Ta või pöörata isegi ümber nurga! Kui neid on korraga palju, satud sa hetkega justkui marutuulte keskele ning sul pole mitte kusagile varjuda.
Kolmas oht läheneb selja tagant, andes mõnikord oma lähenemisest märku läbilõikava heliga. Tõsine kokkupõrge on alati üsna tõenäoline ning sinust möödudes võib ta rebida kaasa sinu pluusi kiude. Oled õnnega koos, kui pääsed sinikatest õla kohal.
Even if you manage to stay intact coming across such a group, you´ll soon be facing another threat. It passes you unexpectedly. It can even turn around a corner!!! If there is more than one you feel surrounded by a a violent storm and you have no where to hide.
The third danger approaches from behind you and likes to warn you (or make your heart stop) with a deafening sound. I can tear away fibers in your jacket and you are lucky to escape without bruises.
Mis see siis tähendab? Kas ma ei pidanud teile mitte tõestama et Kopli on linnaosa nagu iga teinegi, seejuures suhteliselt OHUTU paik? Jaa, seda ma ju üritangi teile praegu selgeks teha, et suurim oht siin on kepikõndijatest pensionärid, rulluisutajad ja jalgratturid, keda on täis kõik pärastlõunaselt uimased tänavasopid, rääkimata tervisesportijate paradiisist - Stroomi rannast, kus nende kontsentratsioon ületab protsentuaalselt keskerakonna võetud pauside hulka tüüpilisel Riigikogu eelnõu-arutelul. Tavaline jalutaja on Koplis TÕSISELT OHUS, sest lisaks juba mainitud rattakrattidele vurab sulle nii eest kui tagant selga lapsevankritega emasid-isasid, ühelt poolt saad vastu pead jalg-, teiselt poolt korvpalliga [katkesta lugemine! kohe tuleb frisbee!] ning kui sa veel rulatajatega kokku juhtud, ei tea sa enam, kuhu suunas sa, vaene hing, peaksid liduma.
What the heck? Was I not suppose to reverse the image of Kopli as a dangerous place? Was I not supposed to prove it is a part of town like any other (well, it most certainly isn´t though, cause it is the most special part of town)? Well....if you haven´t realized it yet, that IS what I am trying to prove with this story. I am trying to make you see that the biggest threat you´ll face coming here are nordic walkers, mostly retired old ladies, rollerskaters, cyclists, runners, who, in an ordinary afternoon fill all streets, not to mention the exercising paradise - the beach area. An ordinary WALKER is always in danger, cause in addition to those health freaks I already mentioned, you have to skip from footballs, basketballs and frisbees flying over your head and block the Spring-Happy dogs ebing walked on the railroad tracks by their owners, who just have to share their joy over getting to chase pigeons and cats by drooling all over every random stranger. What annoyance.
Iga kübekese aja tagant ehmatab sind möödapääsu sooviva tervisejooksja range köhatus ning kui sa siis lootuses veidike rahu saada ja oma nahka säästa kõrvaltänavasse pöörad, blokeerib su tee pallikujuliste mutikeste hord, kes on "guljaanjele" tulnud, ja no sellisel juhul pole enam muud teed kui otse kraavi või mõnda kuusehekki astuda.....mutikesed nalja ei mõista. Parem lugu ei ole ei pargis ega metsas ning isegi, kui arvad, et vähemalt mööda liinidest mööduva raudtee liipreid saad segamatult JALUTADA, siis lendab sulle peale kari kevadest ogaraid penisid, kes sulle nagu igale teisele pahaaimamatule penitatilapile tahavad rõõmusõnumit teatada et Nadsaidperemehegaõue Janeilon Ilgeltmõnnaolla Janadtahakssuotsekohetäisilastada.
Even if you are smart enough to avoid all the threats on wheels, like bunches of moms with baby carriages, you are still in the way of some runner who gives you a startling "KHMM!" from behind ...or a speed-walker, I have seen those. Aven when you turn into THE most tiniest, far-away, quiet little street, you are face to face with a group of "babulyas" (russian for granny or old, round, coat-wearing woman) who are enjoying a "gulyanye" (russian for a very slow walk up and down, up and down, up and down the street or around, around, around the house). And.... that´s it for you. There is no escape from "babulyas". They cover the whole street.
Oeh. Ma teen pea iga päev siin ümbruskonnas õhtul ühe jalutuskäigu. Kuidas ma küll seni olen suutnud raskete füüsiliste kokkupõrgeteta pääseda, vot ei oskagi öelda. Äkki arvatakse et Redfox kannab marutaudi?
Igatahes, ainus võimalus vältida erinevat tüüpi tervisesportlastega kokku põrkamist on võtta oma tagalaks Stromkal olev vabaõhu-jõusaal igasugu kummaliste keerumasinatega. Kuigi...koju pean ikka JALUTAMA.
I take a walk almost every evening in this region and if you asked me how on earth I have managed to avoid greater physical conflict...I honestly can´t say. All I know it is a bloody miracle, and it is getting worse, cause some people have taken up trick bicycling ... there is no end to what we have to suffer here. The only way to deal with it is to join in and go to that open air gym with the weird turntables and walking machines. Ahh, the island of refuge! But I would still have to WALK home somehow.
As soon as I see THEM approaching, I pull my head between my shoulders and try to make myself invisible. They come at you like a whirlwind with sharp sticks in their hands and strike them into the ground just an inch away from your innocent toes, wearing a manic-happy expression that doesnt seem to notice the world around them. They usually wear old sweatsuits and move around in small gangs, although on less crowded streets you can also meet them one at a time, walking hastily and without stopping for scenery. They are constantly checking the clock and they usually carry a plain bottle of water around.
Kui sa taolise kambaga kohtudes ka terveks jääd, siis oled peagi vastamisi järgmise ohuga. See vihiseb sinust mööda täiesti ootamatult. Ta või pöörata isegi ümber nurga! Kui neid on korraga palju, satud sa hetkega justkui marutuulte keskele ning sul pole mitte kusagile varjuda.
Kolmas oht läheneb selja tagant, andes mõnikord oma lähenemisest märku läbilõikava heliga. Tõsine kokkupõrge on alati üsna tõenäoline ning sinust möödudes võib ta rebida kaasa sinu pluusi kiude. Oled õnnega koos, kui pääsed sinikatest õla kohal.
Even if you manage to stay intact coming across such a group, you´ll soon be facing another threat. It passes you unexpectedly. It can even turn around a corner!!! If there is more than one you feel surrounded by a a violent storm and you have no where to hide.
The third danger approaches from behind you and likes to warn you (or make your heart stop) with a deafening sound. I can tear away fibers in your jacket and you are lucky to escape without bruises.
Mis see siis tähendab? Kas ma ei pidanud teile mitte tõestama et Kopli on linnaosa nagu iga teinegi, seejuures suhteliselt OHUTU paik? Jaa, seda ma ju üritangi teile praegu selgeks teha, et suurim oht siin on kepikõndijatest pensionärid, rulluisutajad ja jalgratturid, keda on täis kõik pärastlõunaselt uimased tänavasopid, rääkimata tervisesportijate paradiisist - Stroomi rannast, kus nende kontsentratsioon ületab protsentuaalselt keskerakonna võetud pauside hulka tüüpilisel Riigikogu eelnõu-arutelul. Tavaline jalutaja on Koplis TÕSISELT OHUS, sest lisaks juba mainitud rattakrattidele vurab sulle nii eest kui tagant selga lapsevankritega emasid-isasid, ühelt poolt saad vastu pead jalg-, teiselt poolt korvpalliga [katkesta lugemine! kohe tuleb frisbee!] ning kui sa veel rulatajatega kokku juhtud, ei tea sa enam, kuhu suunas sa, vaene hing, peaksid liduma.
What the heck? Was I not suppose to reverse the image of Kopli as a dangerous place? Was I not supposed to prove it is a part of town like any other (well, it most certainly isn´t though, cause it is the most special part of town)? Well....if you haven´t realized it yet, that IS what I am trying to prove with this story. I am trying to make you see that the biggest threat you´ll face coming here are nordic walkers, mostly retired old ladies, rollerskaters, cyclists, runners, who, in an ordinary afternoon fill all streets, not to mention the exercising paradise - the beach area. An ordinary WALKER is always in danger, cause in addition to those health freaks I already mentioned, you have to skip from footballs, basketballs and frisbees flying over your head and block the Spring-Happy dogs ebing walked on the railroad tracks by their owners, who just have to share their joy over getting to chase pigeons and cats by drooling all over every random stranger. What annoyance.
Iga kübekese aja tagant ehmatab sind möödapääsu sooviva tervisejooksja range köhatus ning kui sa siis lootuses veidike rahu saada ja oma nahka säästa kõrvaltänavasse pöörad, blokeerib su tee pallikujuliste mutikeste hord, kes on "guljaanjele" tulnud, ja no sellisel juhul pole enam muud teed kui otse kraavi või mõnda kuusehekki astuda.....mutikesed nalja ei mõista. Parem lugu ei ole ei pargis ega metsas ning isegi, kui arvad, et vähemalt mööda liinidest mööduva raudtee liipreid saad segamatult JALUTADA, siis lendab sulle peale kari kevadest ogaraid penisid, kes sulle nagu igale teisele pahaaimamatule penitatilapile tahavad rõõmusõnumit teatada et Nadsaidperemehegaõue Janeilon Ilgeltmõnnaolla Janadtahakssuotsekohetäisilastada.
Even if you are smart enough to avoid all the threats on wheels, like bunches of moms with baby carriages, you are still in the way of some runner who gives you a startling "KHMM!" from behind ...or a speed-walker, I have seen those. Aven when you turn into THE most tiniest, far-away, quiet little street, you are face to face with a group of "babulyas" (russian for granny or old, round, coat-wearing woman) who are enjoying a "gulyanye" (russian for a very slow walk up and down, up and down, up and down the street or around, around, around the house). And.... that´s it for you. There is no escape from "babulyas". They cover the whole street.
Oeh. Ma teen pea iga päev siin ümbruskonnas õhtul ühe jalutuskäigu. Kuidas ma küll seni olen suutnud raskete füüsiliste kokkupõrgeteta pääseda, vot ei oskagi öelda. Äkki arvatakse et Redfox kannab marutaudi?
Igatahes, ainus võimalus vältida erinevat tüüpi tervisesportlastega kokku põrkamist on võtta oma tagalaks Stromkal olev vabaõhu-jõusaal igasugu kummaliste keerumasinatega. Kuigi...koju pean ikka JALUTAMA.
I take a walk almost every evening in this region and if you asked me how on earth I have managed to avoid greater physical conflict...I honestly can´t say. All I know it is a bloody miracle, and it is getting worse, cause some people have taken up trick bicycling ... there is no end to what we have to suffer here. The only way to deal with it is to join in and go to that open air gym with the weird turntables and walking machines. Ahh, the island of refuge! But I would still have to WALK home somehow.
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